Sacred Hearts Academy  |   Honolulu, Hawaii

Ka Leo

Sacred Hearts Academy  |   Honolulu, Hawaii

Ka Leo

Sacred Hearts Academy  |   Honolulu, Hawaii

Ka Leo

Military children learn through difficulties of relocation, deployment or separation

Being a part of a military family can be challenging, especially for children, who often find that they must learn to adapt quickly, mature earlier and remain strong when separated from a parent. Military families also face hardships including financial and emotional issues, which arise during relocation, deployment or separation.

Military families constantly move to different stations in the country or overseas because of orders.

“My family has relocated a total of eight times,” said senior Cambria Tech. “After my birth in Virginia, we were always on the move. Wherever they needed my dad we went, and now my family has been living in Hawaii for the past two years.”

When one parent is deployed, a tremendous amount of responsibility is placed on the other to care for the children and take care of the home.

“My father is a colonel in the Air Force, and when he is deployed, we find ourselves in a situation similar to the feeling of a single parent struggling to raise her children,” said junior Maria Cashdollar who has moved 10 times. “If you, as a child, are old enough to understand that your parent is fighting for the country, it can be really tough. Depending on the rank, branch or specialty in the military, you can be incredibly worried about your parent’s safety and not just miss him.”

According to the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, aacap.org, “A family that loses the active presence of a parent through separation often faces significant challenges and stress. During the parent’s deployment, family members may feel isolated, unsupported and anxious.”

Families which communicate often can reduce feelings of distress that may become apparent in children and encourage healthier relationships and a stronger sense of security.

Although distance and time may divide families, there are ways to keep in touch and stay connected.

“Nowadays it is very convenient because we can keep in touch through email, Skype, Twitter and Facebook. Although the danger is still great, a lot of worry disappears whenever I check my dad’s Facebook page and see his status,” said Cashdollar.

Despite the obstacles and difficulties that military children face, studies have shown that children who grow up with such experiences are much more independent, mature and flexible. They tend to learn more and gain a broader perspective on the world while also building confidence and a greater sense of self-reliance.

“Moving can be hard, but it depends on your attitude. My brother and I had to learn to adjust quickly even though we weren’t great at developing relationships,” said Cashdollar. “You learn to ‘drop’ friends quickly and pick up new ones in the next place.”

Tech agreed. “It’s always difficult leaving friends behind and starting over. Although there are times when I believe that moving will ruin my life, I usually look past that to acknowledge the great experiences I’ve had and all the places I’ve seen even before graduating high school.”

About the Contributor
Kanika Ung
Kanika Ung, Reporter
Kanika Ung loves the close-knit school community. She teaches a Cambodian classical dance class every Sunday and performs at local events all over the island. In her free time, Kanika enjoys drawing, reading, and spending time with her family and friends.
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Military children learn through difficulties of relocation, deployment or separation