Too often, bullying is a problem for children and teens in school. Those who bully often seek attention and hurt others to feel powerful and important.
Bullies want their victims to feel left out, insecure and afraid, often targeting the same people.
“The reason they do that is because they want to make themselves feel better by making others feel down,” said senior Alysha Fujitani.
Younger children learn to bully when they see others doing it. To prevent bullying from developing from an early age it is important that schools teach that bullying is wrong.
“When students come to me about relationships, they are not very specific about why they have problems with the person and say things such as, ‘I don’t like her’ or ‘I hate her,’” said high school counselor Donna Ramos. “In groups and cliques they point out things that they dislike about other individuals because she is different.”
In many instances when students experience bullying by their peers, they do not feel comfortable with confiding in an adult because they fear embarrassment or may feel threatened by the bully.
“The reason people don’t tell is because they’re afraid of the bully coming back and hurting them or other students thinking they are not strong enough to deal with the problem,” said Fujitani.
“Most times, kids who are bullied don’t like to open up and tell others for fear of making the situation worse,” said Ramos.
With easy access to the Internet, social networking sites and texting, bullying often continues off campus. Harassment and abusive language online can cause deeper emotional pain and embarrassment that can be more harmful than physical or verbal abuse.
“Cyberbullying is different from verbal and physical bullying because it is more difficult to identify,” said Ramos. “Perpetrators online can be anonymous and are not responsible for his or her actions.”
“Bullying a person in school involves confrontation and guts to do but bullying online does not include confrontation and is for wimps,” said Fujitani. “I think the online bullying is more harmful because sometimes words hurt more than physical contact and those words will always stay online forever.”
Freshman Caroline Kelley agreed. “Online, people can hide behind their computer screens and keep hurting others without really being face to face.”
According to education.com, boys are aggressive and are more likely than girls to be bullies and be bullied by their peers. Boys and girls bully differently, with boys exerting physical violence, such as hitting, kicking and punching. Girls are more verbal and bully others by excluding others from their groups and gossiping. Social norms and beliefs shape the way in which boys and girls bully and react to such situations.
Ramos said, “In my experience, I have seen that boys and girls bully differently. Girls tend to isolate others as a form of bullying and are usually not overt or physical like boys are. Unlike boys, girls often spread rumors and gossip, aiming to ruin another’s reputation. It is a very passive aggressive form of bullying.”
“When I was in the fifth grade, I was the only Caucasian,” said Kelley. “Boys would call me names and make me feel bad. I think boys bullying girls is not as physical, but if they have a problem with others, they should just talk to them and resolve it.”
It is almost impossible to preventing bullying because everyone has been bullied at some point, but there are ways to manage bullies and gain respect from peers.
“It is important that other students acknowledge that there is a problem and stand up for the individual in a crowd,” said Ramos. “Anyone being bullied should recognize that she did nothing wrong and seek a trusted adult for help. Lastly, continue to be a good person, that way, they will have less to say about you, and it will be harder to find fault.”
